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The art of self-control: 8 habits of disciplined people who always win in the long run

Self-control often gets overlooked in today’s world where instant gratification is just one click away. But if you’ve ever admired someone who seems to get what they want in life—whether it’s in career, health, relationships, or personal growth—you’ll likely find one thing behind it all: discipline.

Disciplined people aren’t perfect. They don’t always feel motivated or immune to temptation. The difference is they’ve built habits that allow them to stay focused and consistent, even when things get tough. Over time, this self-control compounds and gives them the edge in the long run.

Let’s dive into 8 habits of disciplined people who always seem to win the marathon of life.

1. They play the long game

Disciplined people aren’t obsessed with short-term wins. They understand that life is more like a marathon than a sprint. Instead of chasing quick dopamine hits, they keep their eyes on bigger goals that might take years to achieve.

Think about someone training for a triathlon. They don’t just wake up one day and decide to run, bike, and swim their way to glory. They train for months—sometimes years—because they know the reward is worth the sacrifice. Disciplined people apply this mindset to everything they do: from saving money, to building a career, to maintaining healthy relationships.

They constantly ask themselves: “Will this choice help me or hurt me in the long run?” And that question alone keeps them grounded when short-term temptations pop up.

2. They create routines and stick to them

Self-control is less about willpower and more about structure. Disciplined people know this. Instead of relying on their mood to dictate their actions, they build routines that automate their good habits.

For example, they might exercise at the same time every morning, or plan their meals for the week on Sundays. By creating predictable systems, they reduce the number of daily decisions they need to make. This saves mental energy and keeps them consistent.

If you’ve ever struggled to build a habit, take a cue from them: set up routines that support your goals. The more automatic your positive habits become, the less self-control you’ll actually need.

3. They understand the power of mindfulness

Discipline isn’t about being rigid or punishing yourself. It’s about awareness—knowing when impulses arise and choosing not to let them control you. This is where mindfulness comes in.

Disciplined people practice being present. They notice when they feel tempted, restless, or distracted, but they don’t immediately act on it. This pause between impulse and action is where real self-control lives.

Personally, mindfulness has been a game-changer for me. In my book, Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How to Live with Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego, I explore how Buddhist teachings offer practical ways to strengthen this exact skill. By being more mindful, you not only gain control over your habits but also develop a deeper sense of clarity and purpose in life.

4. They embrace discomfort

Here’s a truth that disciplined people understand: growth always comes with discomfort. Whether it’s pushing through a tough workout, resisting the urge to splurge on something unnecessary, or sitting with difficult emotions, they know that discomfort is part of the process.

Instead of avoiding pain, they lean into it. They remind themselves that every challenging moment is a chance to strengthen their resilience. It’s like training a muscle—the more you practice tolerating discomfort, the stronger you get.

Next time you find yourself tempted to quit when things get uncomfortable, remember: that’s the exact moment your discipline muscle is being tested and strengthened.

5. They set clear boundaries

Disciplined people don’t leave their self-control to chance. They set clear boundaries to protect their time, energy, and focus. For example, they might keep their phones out of the bedroom, say no to late-night social events before an important meeting, or block distracting websites during work hours

By setting boundaries, they remove friction. They know that discipline isn’t just about pushing harder—it’s about designing an environment that makes it easier to do the right thing.

If you often find yourself struggling with self-control, ask: “What boundaries could I set to make this easier?” It might be as simple as deleting social media apps during the week or meal prepping healthy food so you’re not tempted by takeout.

6. They delay gratification

Remember the famous marshmallow test? Kids who were able to delay gratification—choosing to wait for two marshmallows instead of eating one right away—ended up doing better in life decades later. Disciplined people live this principle every day.

They’re willing to put off immediate pleasure for something bigger down the road. They’ll skip impulsive spending to invest in their future. They’ll resist unhealthy snacks to feel stronger and more energized tomorrow. They’ll sacrifice a lazy afternoon to work on a project that could change their life.

This ability to wait and work toward bigger rewards is one of the strongest predictors of long-term success. And the good news? It’s a skill anyone can practice. Start small—maybe by waiting 10 minutes before indulging in a craving—and build from there.

7. They focus on progress, not perfection

Disciplined people know they’re not robots. They mess up sometimes. But instead of beating themselves up, they focus on progress. One slip-up doesn’t erase all their hard work. What matters is getting back on track as quickly as possible.


This mindset shift is huge. Perfectionism kills discipline because it makes you give up the moment you stumble. Progress thinking, on the other hand, keeps you moving forward—even if it’s imperfect.

Disciplined people don’t ask, “Did I do this perfectly today?” They ask, “Am I better than I was yesterday?” That’s the secret to their resilience and long-term success.

8. They align their habits with their values

Finally, disciplined people don’t just force themselves into habits because they think they “should.” Their discipline is rooted in something deeper: their values. They know what matters most to them—whether it’s health, family, freedom, or contribution—and they let those values guide their daily choices.

For example, someone who values health doesn’t see exercise as a chore—they see it as a way to live fully and take care of their body. Someone who values financial freedom doesn’t see budgeting as restriction—they see it as empowerment.

When your habits are connected to your values, discipline feels less like sacrifice and more like alignment. It’s no longer about forcing yourself—it’s about being true to who you are and what you care about most.

Bringing it all together

Self-control isn’t about being the toughest or most stubborn person in the room. It’s about creating habits and systems that keep you aligned with your long-term goals and deepest values.

The 8 habits above—playing the long game, sticking to routines, practicing mindfulness, embracing discomfort, setting boundaries, delaying gratification, focusing on progress, and aligning with values—are the building blocks of true discipline. And when practiced consistently, they put you on the path to long-term success and fulfillment.


If you want to take these ideas deeper, my book Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How to Live with Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego offers a practical roadmap for developing mindfulness, discipline, and purpose. It’s a gentle but powerful guide for anyone who wants to live with more control and clarity.


At the end of the day, disciplined people don’t “win” because they’re smarter or luckier. They win because they’ve built habits that make winning inevitable. And that’s something anyone—including you—can start doing today.

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